


The Shadow of Your Heart

by Rosage



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: F/F, Fire Emblem Fates: Revelation Spoilers, Pre-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-29
Updated: 2016-10-29
Packaged: 2018-08-23 12:23:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,997
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8327686
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rosage/pseuds/Rosage
Summary: Hoshido knows Mikoto as a radiant queen. Reina knows her as a mourning mother, mishap creator, and secret keeper. As her comforter, protector, and confidant, Reina may not be able to add consort to the list, but having to hide has never stopped either of them.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SirAranIsWriting](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SirAranIsWriting/gifts).



> This is my main Femslash Exchange gift for SirAranisWriting, who I hope enjoys it! I had a lot of fun expanding on these characters.
> 
> Thanks to Phrenotobe and Aurumite for previewing this.

Reina never cleans Corrin’s room. Even if a draft displaces an inked drawing, Mikoto sinks to her knees at the change. As Reina lacks a delicate touch, Kagero dusts the chamber, and never within sight. It makes the room seem magical, staying pristine only through a divine mother’s wish.

There’s no magic in Mikoto’s tears, shed while kneeling on the floor. The night hides her wet face, only known to Reina by the damp front of her kimono and the trembling head in her lap. She unbinds Mikoto’s hair, letting it tangle while she strokes it, then brushes it after Mikoto has gone dry and still.

No words are exchanged the first time Mikoto lifts her head and threads her own fingers in Reina’s hair. She applies the lightest pressure to the back of Reina’s neck, a request, not a demand. Reina follows it as readily as any order, dipping to trail her lips along the salty paths of Mikoto’s cheeks. It ends there that night, but during later evenings she tastes the sweet remnants of Mikoto’s desserts and the slightly different salt of a sweating neck. None of it is better or worse, simply the flavors that make up her liege.

Reina is used to making people scream. Under her fingers Mikoto is so silent that not even a ninja could tell she had been sobbing. Her pulse races, thrumming with blood, and for once Reina is invested only in keeping any of it from spilling out of Mikoto’s soft skin.

While Reina takes these developments in stride, Mikoto starts to put halting words to them. She has always had a heart full of love, and she needs to make sure Reina knows of her gratitude and her reservations. Reina accepts and responds to each of these feelings with quiet steadiness. During the day not much is different, other than a new appreciation for the way Mikoto’s hair and skin catch the sunlight. In the dark Reina nurtures her affections, an invisible, warm flame.

Winter turns to spring and then summer. The room doesn’t shift an inch. But a change takes place in Reina, under the surface, where all feelings she doesn’t like to dwell on live.

* * *

Reina isn’t the only one who knows Mikoto’s grief. Kagero and Orochi see her weep, and are unable to do much beyond brew her tea or tell her stories. Being older, Reina keeps more distance from them than they do each other, though she does appreciate their skills as retainers and their mutual love of their liege.

This is especially true on the outings they all take. Maintenance of the barrier along Hoshido’s border often has Mikoto straying far from the throne room. In fact, Reina has never seen Mikoto upon the throne; she assumes there’s some lingering discontent with Mikoto as a replacement for Sumeragi’s first queen. She wonders with amusement what the people would make of her as a replacement for Sumeragi, but she has no desire to be one, or to let word get back to her parents about her position leading the kinshi knights.

Atop her kinshi, Reina can navigate these trips and even lend Mikoto a ride. It’s one argument Mikoto made to those who questioned her choice in retainers. While Reina isn’t as controversial as Orochi, palace residents are often as perplexed by her as her family was.

Sometimes Reina thinks of flying home. Even if she didn’t touch down, perhaps she could spy on her parents from the air. She’d certainly see the magistrate’s tower where she used to watch the sky. She always lets the wind carry those thoughts away, scanning the path ahead of Mikoto for enemy traps.

The barrier stands close to the Bottomless Canyon—not so much that it’s visible from the ground, but from the air, Reina can see the chasm. Every time, she feels the urge to plummet into its depths and discover their secrets. There must be _something_ down there, though she can’t say how she knows. Only that the potential of that darkness calls to her, and that the call strikes deep in her bones whenever Mikoto is near, even though she is the sun itself.

Lightning flashes. Mikoto signals for Reina to land before she can enjoy the sight of it splitting the sky.

Slowly Mikoto walks along the perimeter with her festal raised. Her eyes close in concentration, but she steps easily over cracks, some divine second sight showing her the path. Orochi’s eyes remain open as she follows along, scattering herbs in Mikoto’s wake. Lightning swallows the festal’s glow. The sight mesmerizes Reina for several lengths. Without raising a weapon, Mikoto protects an entire kingdom. It tugs at Reina, some memory of what she desired when she first picked up a naginata.

Soon she grows bored of serving as guard in an empty land. She is a weapon, not a shield, and she wishes some faceless would come through the barrier to give her some fun (and distract her from the chasm’s pull, a strange whirlpool in her heart).

The thought shames even her. When her queen is not present, she may wish danger into the area.

Mikoto halts so suddenly that Orochi almost scatters herbs on her back. Her profile, with its usual round edges, looks severe as it turns sharply toward the canyon. Moments later Reina spots a blotch rise over its edge like ink spilled in water. A hand, gloved and armored, pulls a head and then an arm onto the ledge.

Mikoto points. Orochi’s eyes do not quite land on the right spot, but she summons a bull that charges across the magical barrier to trample on the hand. It slips back down into the canyon.

As if summoned by Reina’s wishes, two more soldiers climb up to take that one’s place. They’re on the other side of the barrier, but Mikoto’s orders are not to be questioned, and as the bull charges a second time Reina shoots an arrow through the crack in a shadowy helmet. Smoke curls up while the head disappears from view.

She wish they’d scream. Instead three more rise noiselessly. Reina keeps shooting, waiting for a chance to mount her kinshi. If only she could take to the skies over the canyon, she could easily shoot them down before they finish scaling it. Even with Kagero’s shuriken spinning in from the shadows, enemies keep rising, and Reina falls into the rhythm of her favorite game.

People sometimes ask Reina how she can take delight in killing. _Have you no empathy for your victims?_ She doesn’t say that she did, once, when a bandit was old enough to resemble her father. She only points out that as long as the barrier stands, only Faceless can invade Hoshido. Is she to pity those who cannot pity themselves?

Faceless can’t be deterred with an arrow to the eye. The goal is to knock them down; when they fall, they fall hard. Arrows to the ankles and feet do the trick. These shadow warriors have neither clear faces, nor such bulk. If Mikoto weren’t there, Reina would let a few advance, just to see what it would take to defeat them head-on. As it is she keeps mental count of the arrows left in her quiver, praying they don’t run out before the enemies.

As she reaches for her last arrow, Mikoto holds out an arm. Minutes pass before she nods a confirmation that the enemies are gone. In the space of time that it takes lightning to flash, Mikoto’s queenly posture buckles, and she crumbles to the ground.

Orochi is closest, and Kagero arrives in an instant to her side. But it’s Reina whose front Mikoto buries her face in, and Reina who takes their lady into her arms. Orochi’s hands hover, clearly wanting to stroke Mikoto’s trembling back, but Kagero pulls her away with a meaningful glance.

Mikoto raises her face enough to be heard. It’s pale, but slicked only with sweat. “Please, listen, all of you—you must never speak of this.”

An ordinary team may have questioned what just happened, but Mikoto has not assembled an ordinary team.

Perhaps it’s for the best, as though it cannot be said to be daylight, this is still the closest to it that Reina has come while crooning sweet words into her lady’s ear, and the others silently slink back to give the pair privacy.

* * *

Reina usually trains alone. She tends to murmur to herself at the archery range, soon finding herself without company even if others had been practicing alongside her. Mikoto is usually too busy with duties to watch, but she appears the day after they return from their latest trip, watching silently.

“You can see them,” Mikoto says when Reina has used up her arrows. Reina wipes her brow, mindful to do so with a towel rather than her arm in her lady’s presence.

“I beg your pardon, milady?”

Mikoto’s mouth moves soundlessly. Reina watches with interest; she’s felt those lips in many positions, but can’t remember seeing Mikoto at such a loss for words. “Forgive my vagueness. I meant our excursion yesterday. You took perfect aim at our attackers.”

“Of course. My arrows will always strike the heart of your enemies.” She thinks Mikoto will say something about the shadows that rose from the canyon. Instead, Mikoto reaches for a bow.

“May I train with you?”

Mikoto has always possessed rare enough magical talent that were she not queen, she could have been the queen’s most valued diviner. Watching Orochi has shown Reina how flighty and murky the magic arts can be. Without questioning the new choice of weapon, she stands beside Mikoto and corrects her grip on the bow.

From then on, Mikoto joins her frequently at the range. She apologizes often for interrupting Reina’s training until Reina lists the skills Mikoto has taught her. On their trips away from the capital Mikoto revealed talents for detecting traps, playing music, and diving for ore. The latter showed her to be a more graceful swimmer than Reina could have expected from someone who once tripped into a fountain.

Her archery does not prove the same. Many consider it as scattered as her clumsy moments, but Reina sees the way her eyes go dark when she bends the bow and knows her lady aims with purpose. Orochi and Kagero are the only other ones who seem to notice.

At the range one day Mikoto says without preamble, “My barrier will only protect those in Hoshido.”

“Most could scarcely dream of protecting an entire country,” Reina says as she mops sweat from Mikoto’s brow. After checking that nobody is around—except perhaps Kagero, lurking behind some target—she presses her lips to Mikoto’s forehead. Relief and exhaustion mingle in Mikoto’s sigh.

“Yes, but…what of the rest of the world? And what of our people who venture out? An animal trapped within a glass bowl will suffocate.” Mikoto doesn’t need to clarify that she’s thinking of Cheve.

“My arrows will pierce the glass at your will, Lady Mikoto.”

Mikoto’s smile is tight, not the bright face she shows others. “Thank you, but I cannot burden your bow alone.” She picks up her quiver and goes to collect the arrows before getting into position for another round.

* * *

Sooner than scheduled, Mikoto takes the same team of three to the border. They guard the canyon without interruption, hearing only thunder and the pattering of squirrel paws. Reina shoots one out of boredom and because the clawing against rock was making Mikoto flinch. As the barrier did not need repairing, they return early.

Mikoto does not seem reassured. After she’s through receiving audiences she stands hovering beside the throne. Her hand ghosts over it, fingers not quite touching the arm. Reina thinks about that feather-light touch and the moments when it turns to a halting grasp.

Without turning to Reina, Mikoto beckons her, and Reina climbs the steps to stand at Mikoto’s side.

“Have you ever considered sitting on this throne?” Mikoto asks.

Reina wonders if Mikoto is asking her to be queen, and her heart surprises her by thumping in her chest. “I must admit I haven’t.”

Mikoto’s finger follows a swirl painted onto the chair arm. “You know the legend about it, yes? It may be presumptuous, but I just thought… Perhaps there were some memories, or some… Parts of you that you wanted to revisit.”

Thoughts of royal weddings vanish. The thumping remains, loud in the quiet room. Reina wants—she needs a scream to drown it out. “I feel quite whole as I am,” she says, voice more forceful than it’s ever been when addressing her queen.

Mikoto looks at her, her frown creased with worry. “Of course. Forgive me for suggesting otherwise.”

Reina breathes as Kagero taught her. She takes care to soften her voice. “Don’t trouble yourself on my account, my lady. If you’ll forgive my own presumption… Are you the one who wishes to take a seat?”

Mikoto’s eyes seem old then, as deep as the ocean yet as glassy as a pond. Looking into them is like looking at light refracting off something underwater, the shape and distance obscured. “Among my subjects, I cannot. Yet…”

Something in her eyes becomes clear, like an arrow directed at Reina. Reina takes the full brunt of their meaning, then lets the shine on Mikoto’s tiara and lips catch her gaze. She takes in Mikoto’s collected stance, her pressed clothes, and the one mole on her smooth cheek. She saw none of this in the room where they grew close.

She words her response carefully so that it will not be mistaken for a rejection. “The Mikoto before me is already as full and satisfactory as the cycle of day and night.”

Mikoto’s lips part, then raise slowly into a smile, crooked and radiant. Her hand ceases hovering in favor of pulling Reina close.

* * *

Privately Mikoto still weeps, but the shadows are driven from her face in moments. She and Sakura gobble sweets together, nearly choking until Reina gives Mikoto’s back a firm chop. Orochi makes puppets and puts on a show full of surreal jokes at which only Mikoto guffaws. Hinoka accompanies Mikoto on walks as if to make up for lost time.

One day Reina enters the stables to a round of shrieking. It concerns her little until she finds Mikoto in her kinshi’s stall, covering her face from a barrage of pecking.

Reina runs to throw her body in front of Mikoto’s. Grabbing her kinshi’s head with gloved hands, she tries to talk it down, but even a mix of commands and praise doesn’t soothe it.

Mikoto places her hands on Reina’s back. “I only offered it a treat.”

Something clicks in Reina’s brain, and she spots the smear of red bean paste on her kinshi’s beak, too thick to be blood. “Have you eaten any?”

“Well, I…”

“ _Have you_?”

“No. I offered it one first, so it would accept me. Heavens, this isn’t what I…”

“Fetch a kinshi healer, if you’ll please.” Mikoto runs off. Reina is too busy subduing her kinshi to care that she’s given orders to her sovereign.

When the stall is occupied only by the healer and the quieted kinshi, Reina brings Mikoto into the shadow of an empty stall. Removing a glove, Reina cups Mikoto’s face to examine it. Though pale, it’s evaded the brunt of a kinshi assault. Reina drops her hand to pluck a feather from Mikoto’s crumpled clothes.

“Forgive my abruptness, but your safety was at stake. Kinshi are trained as poison detectors. We’ll have to deliver the rest of those desserts to Kagero for inspection.”

“Goodness, I didn’t even think. I am so sorry I endangered your partner.”

“No, you’ve done well. I shudder to think what would have happened if you’d eaten one.” Poison’s effect on the body interests Reina, but such cowardice takes the fun out of a kill. Once Kagero finds the culprit, Reina will hunt them down with relish.

The present situation confounds her too much to plan further. To think, Mikoto’s life may have been saved because she thought mochi was a proper offering for a kinshi. The blend of curses and bizarre serendipity in her liege and love’s life never ceases to make Reina marvel.

Still, she appreciates Mikoto’s desire to befriend her kinshi, so she offers to take her flying the next day.

* * *

In the daylight, to an outsider, Corrin’s room looks innocent enough. Kagero has succeeded in wiping away the passage of time, and Reina has wiped Mikoto’s tears before they can soak into the floor. If a visitor looked closely enough, they’d notice the picture Corrin drew has been faded by sunlight, but at the right angle shadows obscure the decay.

Mikoto stands at the door, her mind clearly in some other land. Perhaps she’s picturing herself flying on a kinshi’s back to rescue Corrin herself, the sort of recklessness she so feared in Hinoka. If so, she’s prudent enough not to say.

When the sunbeam’s angle changes, Reina gently directs Mikoto away from the room, to the stables. She’s glad for an excuse to have Mikoto’s arms around her without fear of visibility. Mikoto’s grip is snug around her waist. It tightens as they lift off.

They’ve flown together, but only for practical purposes. Reina had forgotten how much she enjoys the wind’s shriek even when it carries no other cries.

As Mikoto’s head rests upon Reina’s shoulder, Reina imagines her looking out past the kinshi’s wing, over all of Hoshido, the land they protect. She imagines her looking further, to where Corrin is being held in some castle, and perhaps further than that, to wherever she is when her eyes go glassy.

Lips press against Reina’s neck, and she stops imagining. She already has what she desires. Here, in the sunlight, it can be Mikoto’s turn to taste.


End file.
